You love the word or you hate it. I’m not sure there’s an in between. I was thinking about it today, as a matter of fact, and figured I’d share.
My youngest daughter and I participated in this year’s V-Day celebration by taking part in our local production of The Vagina Monologues. One of the monologues is called “Vagina Workshop” and portrays one woman’s story of taking a workshop that helped women discover “their own, unique, beautiful vagina.”
Yeah, I know that “beautiful” is not an adjective we tend to use in conversations about the vagina — not that we HAVE many conversations about it to start with. Let’s face it, it’s a totally unsexy word. Which brings me to another of the Monologues — other words women use around the world when referring to the vagina — but that’s a post for another day.
My friend, Elke, is an artist, and we WERE having a conversation about vaginas the other evening. Well, not specifically about vaginas, but more about body parts in general which eventually got around to vaginas. There’s a lot of art centered on them, by far more artists than you’d ever imagine. Most of us are familiar with Georgia O’Keefe, and perhaps she was one of the pioneers of vagina art, but just do a Google search on the term “vagina art” and you’ll discover a whole other world — from pillows to mosaics to amazing photographs and more.
Speaking of amazing photographs, you’d be equally amazed at the variety of vaginas. Perhaps you’ve wondered (I can almost guarantee you a majority of other women have wondered) if your vagina is “normal.” Given the results of my own Google search today, I truly believe that the word doesn’t even remotely relate to a vagina outside the fact of whether it has all the correct anatomical parts. Beyond that, every vagina is so unique it’s a work of art unto itself.
The image above is based on a drawing by Elke. I’ve been thinking of adding a section to the site for artwork centered on women’s views of their bodies. What do you think? Have some art you’d like to share?
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I was searching the internet the other day (as I very frequently do), and I ran across a blog that has been around for quite some time … Victoria’s Sex Blog (note: I would not consider this link work friendly). Unfortunately, the blog ended in January 2010, and its author has moved on to bigger and better things. I say “unfortunately,” because I had just discovered it and would have liked to see it continue. However, there are several years of archives that one could spend weeks investigating.
What I really liked about “Victoria’s” posts is that they are so natural, so down to earth in their presentation, yet they are invariably accompanied by drawings of nude men and/or women either alone or in various stages of sexual activity. Seems she started her journey in these types of drawings by taking photos from porn sites and drawing them, which took what could be considered “obscene” and brought it to a level of sensuality. Fascinating stuff.
Anyway, one of the posts really caught my attention, and that is the reason behind today’s post. What she did was use her digital camera set on the timer mode to take various nude photos of herself. She then printed the photo out on 8-1/2 x 11 paper, put a piece of tracing paper over the photo image, and traced the outlines of her body.
What it did for her was cause her to look at her body in a completely different way. Rather than standing naked before a mirror with its accompanying criticism and negative self talk, she began to appreciate the many curves and lines of her body. That appreciation led to other revelations both physical and emotional.
I don’t know about you, but I just thought this was awesome. Every woman should undertake this exercise. I know it’s something I’m going to do. Maybe I’ll add an Artwork page to the site where we can all post our glorious selves.
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One of the sometimes scary benefits of having a blog about sex is the conversations it opens with my husband. We were talking about sex toys specifically and the fact that as part of being involved with product reviews, there would inevitably be some things we would try out together.
Within that conversation, I mentioned that I find it really easy to talk about sex with pretty much anyone … except him. It’s not that we never talk about sex. It’s more that it’s a little bit intimidating because of the familiarity. Familiarity involves more risk.
For example, have you ever looked at your partner — say, when you’re out together somewhere and he or she is across the room talking to someone else — and noticed how attracted you are? As if you’ve stepped outside of that relationship box and seen them again for the very first time? Kind of like an out-of-body experience.
You forget that this is the person you see every day, frequently in the most unflattering situations. You ignore the visions of dirty underwear and socks on the floor, the petty arguments, the sometimes obnoxious way they chew their food.
You see him as if for the very first time. He’s hot, smart, sexy and has the most beautiful smile that makes his eyes sparkle. You see him as others see him, and it magnifies your attraction.
You wonder if he ever feels the same way about you.
The question is, do you share that with him? Most women will answer something like “Oh my god, no. I’d be too embarrassed. He’d totally make fun of me.”
It’s so much easier to stay with the familiar. To share is to be vulnerable. Yet within the vulnerability lies the potential.
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