One of the sometimes scary benefits of having a blog about sex is the conversations it opens with my husband. We were talking about sex toys specifically and the fact that as part of being involved with product reviews, there would inevitably be some things we would try out together.
Within that conversation, I mentioned that I find it really easy to talk about sex with pretty much anyone … except him. It’s not that we never talk about sex. It’s more that it’s a little bit intimidating because of the familiarity. Familiarity involves more risk.
For example, have you ever looked at your partner — say, when you’re out together somewhere and he or she is across the room talking to someone else — and noticed how attracted you are? As if you’ve stepped outside of that relationship box and seen them again for the very first time? Kind of like an out-of-body experience.
You forget that this is the person you see every day, frequently in the most unflattering situations. You ignore the visions of dirty underwear and socks on the floor, the petty arguments, the sometimes obnoxious way they chew their food.
You see him as if for the very first time. He’s hot, smart, sexy and has the most beautiful smile that makes his eyes sparkle. You see him as others see him, and it magnifies your attraction.
You wonder if he ever feels the same way about you.
The question is, do you share that with him? Most women will answer something like “Oh my god, no. I’d be too embarrassed. He’d totally make fun of me.”
It’s so much easier to stay with the familiar. To share is to be vulnerable. Yet within the vulnerability lies the potential.
Like this entry? You'll love getting updates and other great sex tips and information that may never appear on the regular blog! No spam, and I won't give your email address to anyone.
